1) Intro
2) Can a Girl Be a Bastard?
3) Ghetto Prize or Fucked-Up White Family
4) Dead Santa
5) Fart Asphyxiation
6) Make the White Pee
7) Parents' Divorce
8) Single Mom
9) Gramps ; Grams
10) Rapunzel Garcia
11) Blue Balls Strategy
12) College Horny Dog
13) Penny
14) The Night Before Christmas
15) Gotta Get Some
16) Evelyn
17) My Divorce
18) Grampa's Pinga
19) High at Grampa's Funeral
20) Teeny-Da Woman Who Called Me on My Bullshit
21) Costumed X-Mas
22) Holes in My Condom
23) Sonogram-No Ding Dong!
24) Home Birth or Bikini Wax
25) Human Dairy Farm
26) Yakkity Yak
27) It's Got a Ding Dong
28) Airing Their Differences
29) Colicky Son or the Little Prick
30) Bedtime Story